My mentality prior to hospital was already verging on the mashed potato state, and this has annoyingly (or not so annoyingly for you) meant that I have had as much motivation or enthusiasm to blog as someone who eats baked beans out of a can. Therefore, over time you can imagine, these hours of mindlessly existing have meant that I have accumulated quite the procrastinating talent.So this post is to pay homage to a couple of things which have just about prevented me evolving into a vegetable.
Sudoku
Suduko? Sodoku? SoDoKukoo?
Pretty sure that I have just named four Pokemon characters..
But yes, this strange brain exercise which serves no use and accomplishes nothing has become somewhat of an addiction and I continue to fill in the nine by nine boxes, kidding myself that I am a maths genius. I think I may have peaked my Sudoku limit as when I lay in bed at night I get the same sensation you get when you've been on a boat all day and feel like you're still on the water, only I am playing sudoku.. in my head.. Okay let's move on.
Lists
Writing lists is a favourite pastime of mine and if it isn't one of yours then I highly suggest this excellent, mind numblingly electrifying activity for any poor soul in search of that one thing missing from their life.
10 Reasons To Write Lists.
1. To procrastinate
2. To make yourself feel like you're achieving something
3. To remind yourself that you can still count.
4. To procrastinate.
5. It fills time.
6. It keeps yourself busy from doing anything that you're meant to be doing.
7. To kid yourself that you will do things tomorrow.
8. The act of writing the lists is good exercise for your fingers
9. You can re-read the list in funny accents
10. To procrastinate.
Netflix
Damn you father Wyatt for paying for Netflix. My first year of university has been immersed into this world of films, documentaries, and TV programmes that are repeated constantly on Dave anyway. Now I would like to think that I can reflect on my Netflix binging problem with fond memories. We can't forget the good times; Unbreakable Kimmy Schmit giving me hope that genuinely funny American programmes DO exist, rekindling my love for all that Louis Theroux can throw at me, the foreign film category opening my eyes to an array of fantastique films (because I'm all cultured and that). And of course, how could I not mention Orange is the New Black?! The lemon to my tequila, the porn to my stache, the flavour packets to my kosher meal, my dandelion. OITNB has a firm place in my heart, and despite the controversy around Season 3 not living up to the first two seasons, I will never give up on ma gals at Litchfield.
But yes, back to Netflix, and despite such wonders it has provided me, I have encountered a serious issue. I waste more time CHOOSING what to watch than actually watching anything!
Do I want comedy? If so, do I want a programme or a film? Or perhaps some stand up? Do I want to watch a classic British comedy that I have seen before? Or a new American romcom that's just been released? Or perhaps I should enlighten myself and delve into a documentary about some Amish girl who has decided to start running a brothel. BUT WAIT!! What about Prison Break?! Do I jump on the bandwagon and start a treacherous commitment to this life consuming programme?
Actually, I think I will just watch videos of funny cats on Youtube.
And lastly, the deadly compulsion caused by the combination of boredom and the internet.
Porn. Porn of the bidding type.
Yes eBay, I am directing this at you.
With a 'Watching List' usually averaging at approximately 130 items at a time, my bidding, let alone actually winning or purchasing, proof record is somewhat feeble. Yet hours I will spend, convinced that I will find THE PERFECT pair of size 6, original Levis (high waisted), in the perfect 90's blue, for 99p.
I am still yet to succeed this mission, but do no worry folks! Thou Shall Not Give Up.
But I do owe a lot to eBay (not literally, I always pay my fee on time). A 20p Mickey Mouse necklace from China, the £1 iPhone charger that blew up at the power socket, and the hundreds of piggy banks that filled my dads office. Whilst I'm at it.. thank you to that girl from Birmingham who purchased a £1 Primark crop top for £12, I hope one day you realise you could have bought 120 flumps for that little piece of orange material.
Uno problemo... I want to get a movie from eBay but am rather confused. Do I click 'Buy' or 'Watch this item'?
Yours sincerely Molly Wyatt
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Putting the Pro in Procrastination since 2011
