All these feminists *rolls eyes* are taking over the world. Before we know it we're going to have Lena Dunham running the country and Ellen Degeneres' face on our £10 notes.
Studying Media and Gender as part of my university course I have used all my intelligence, scholar readings, and academic ability to put together for you, why these feminists are the real monsters of Halloween.
- They have spears which can kill ppl.
- Their hairy pits probZ have lice.
- Their moaning is giving me an earache: who needz equal pay when our man can pay 4 our lush bath bombs anyway!
- I don’t need femims - if galz don’t want to be abused online just dnt go on the internet & live in ur shed.
- Who's gna bake muffins 4 da cake sale at skwl which is 4 CHARITY.. Therefore fems are bein uncharitable.
- Speaking of which.. Cath kidston is gna go down in business coz there'll b no women in da kitchen to use their new floral mixing bowl.
- They r RLY RLY loud n it's like "hey c'mon, I'm trying to listen to all the misogyny" - (show sum respect plz)!!!
- I WANT to treat myself to freshly packaged 'pearl' tampons coz spending money on dem makes me feel even more posh! Plus our hubbies are the ones paying anyway cause I don't have a job - the house is my job (WHICH I LUV BY THE WAY - CLEANIN N COOKIN IS WOT I WAS PUT ON EARTH FOR)
- Y should girls sport teams get air time?! I WANT 2 SEE THE SEXY MALE RUGBY PLAYERS' THIGHS RIPPIN THROUGH THEIR SHORTS, NOT SWEATY BOOB PATCHES!! I dnt care if u train da same amount as men, ur meant to be at home anyway!!! (Or out shopping).
- We dnt need feminidm coz then i'd have to do that DIY thing! Nd I don't even no what that stands 4?
- We don't need femimimims in the government coz wot will they be called if they get David Cameron's job? They can't be a female Primemister... It'd be like having a man midwife.. JUST NOT LOGICALLY POSSIBLE!!!!
- Men aren't allowed in the feminism club and that just isn't fair.
- Equal pay in da acting world is silly coz James Bond is the main character so should be getting more money... These femims haven't thought this through.
- Femims are preventing men from cat-calling nd that's not fair on men to be told what to do.
- Feminism might endanger our most treasured resource: the opinion of a heterosexual, white, middle class man & extinction is scary :(
- I don't need feminism coz how r men actually supposed to understand consent?!
- Feminists just hate men and they wna take over the world and that's sexist so therefore they are HYPOKRITS!
- Femims need to stop coz breast feeding in public is gross and what happens if the milk splashes in my coffee??? I'm vegan not cannibal.
- Nd anyway femims have created a myth called the patriarchy (but just like my eyelashes, the patriarchy isn't real). Surely if this thing WAS real then men would dominate most of the political, economical and media industries!!!!!!!!!
- Please note my British, hilariously outrageous sarcasm throughout the entirety of this piece.
I was recently talking to a guy at a bar who said: "Oh so you're one of THOSE feminists are you?" *rolled eyes and smirked*
My response was: "Oh so you're one of those human beings who does not believe in equal rights for all?"
Feminists do NOT want to rule over men. In fact feminists love men, feminists love women, feminists ARE men, feminists ARE women.. and all those in between.
To demean somebody of an ethnic minority because they were addressing a racist issue, is disgusting, outrageous behaviour.
The same applies to feminism. And I'm so incredibly tired of myself and many others actually feeling slightly embarrassed of calling ourself a 'feminist'. Unfortunately society has a completely skewed idea of what 'feminists' actually stand for and this sure as heck needs to change.
